incredible

The Day I Met You !

2011-04-28T15:41:00.000+05:30

The day I met you, I didn’t knew, we will come so far together.

The day I saw you, I didn’t thought, we will become friends forever.

The day I knew you, I didn’t felt, we will someday miss each other.

The day I called you, I had no idea about our friendship, altogether.

You understood my wonders, and listened to my dreams.

You heard to how I felt about Love & Life, and knew what it all means.

Never ever did you interrupt me, or said me I was wrong.

You understood what I was going through, and assured you’d stay long.

It was your smile which told me that life is not so mean.

It was your eyes which said me to hold back during thick & thin.

It was your faith which forced me to believe in myself.

It was your cuteness which dragged me to you, itself.

I was there for you, not to make you dependent on me.

I cared for you, so that one day you will set yourself free.

With you I smile, I laugh, I do idiotic things, I feel adventuress.

But I did felt bad one day which you know I would never express.

The moments we spent will never go away from my heart.

No matter wherever we are, we won’t ever be apart.

You’re never alone, I am always there for you.

Just reach your cell phone Phantom, & I am here for you.

I will miss you in every walk of my life. Take Care !

(P.S. : This poem is meant for a very sweet friend. We are parting our ways for some reasons.)

Aakash & Ria - 3

2011-04-02T11:21:00.000+05:30

'I don't know what to do. I have my exams in next 20 days & I am not prepared at all.' Ria was tensed about her CS exam which she has to give again cause last year she overslept in one paper.

'Chill sweetie, you just have three subject and you will be able to clear it easily, just focus from now on. The topics are not that tough.' Confidently said Aakash unaware about the complexities of the subjects but he had confidence in Ria. She was a intelligent & hard working gal, but she needed the push.

'I am good at two subject but the third one.... oh god.. You feel it's easy, have you read it earlier', asked Ria

'Yeah, I have read all that in my graduation, it's not that tough', said aakash to make her feel lighter, cause worrying about a problem makes it bigger.. and he never did that, even if he had an hour before exam.

'Can you teach me?'

'Ya sure, anytime for you', He couldn't say no to her, he never did in his life.

'Should i come over at your place or will you come at mine ?' she said mischievously cause she knew Aakash wouldn't let her travel alone to his place. He would come to pick her up.

'I would come sweetheart, don't you get bothered and act smart with me.'

'ohk then, you can come from tomorrow.. i have taken leave at office for my exams, and Mamma will be at home, is it alright for you', Ria just wanted to tease him.

'Obviously it's alright for me, i hope you are calling for studying, so aunty won't be angry on it..' Aakash understood she was in playful mood and was also excited to meet aunty for the first time.

'Hmm.. i will call you tomorrow..and tell you the time'

'Sure, bye for now, take care'

Aakash said that he will teach her, but how... the subject she has to study, aakash only had rough idea and few topics were unheard to him before. Besides, it has been almost 2 years since he completed his grad, so he was even out of flow.. but he didn't want to sound low infront of Ria, cause he knew that might be this is the chance when he can meet Ria a bit often. The last time they met was some two and a half months back and before that some eight months back. Aakash could do anything, be anything, learn anything if that results in seeing Ria more frequently or if possible, daily... He has stopped fighting with her over petty issues since they didn't talk for 6 months, and somewhere Aakash thought that his anger will just keep Ria away from him. She has to go one day, maybe in next few years when she will get married to some well-settled guy (every family wants that n even every girl) , & Aakash would take time to settle, he has to take admission in a B-school and complete his MBA, all of which would take a least of 3 years. So he knew that she would never be his forever but he can be with her until...... He loved her from his school days, but he somewhere got matured in his love now. After 7 and a half year he actually started understanding her, her feelings, her weird mind, her soft heart, her don't care attitude and her caring side. He was trying to understand that now she doesn't love him and he is a good friend to her, and he can't change her feelings for him, maybe, he didn't wanted to...anymore.. He just wanted to keep her happy till the time he can be with her, no matter what. He have stopped feeling about his own feelings.

Aakash called up his Bhabhi for suggesting him a right book for the subject he has to teach her. She was a genius in her studies & the only person who understood Aakash madness for Ria. She suggested him the well known book for Corporate accounting. Aakash bought the book in next hour and by evening he opened the book. Corporate accounting was not in his syllabus of Grad, so he couldn't get anything much besides few share and debenture topic. He turned the pages for a hour but seemed helpless. He thought to take coaching for the subject but it wasn't possible cause next day he had to teach her. He called his few friends who might be aware of the subject and luck favoured him. One of his friend agreed to impart his valuable knowledge over the subject, (for aakash it was priceless). They decided to meet next morning.. Aakash took a sign of relief and slept off.

Sharp, at 9:00 am he reached at Ravi's place. Ravi was half asleep but Aakash kicked him hard enough to make him sit on his bed.

'What happened? Why do you need to study corporate so urgently? What are you doing these days in life?', Ravi said, waking up rubbing his ass.

'Nothing, am just planning to do CS'

'Stop kidding, tell me else i won't teach you.' Ravi started blackmailing.

'Ohk dude, One of my childhood friend has exam of CS in next few weeks, and he is not prepared, i just want to help him out', Aakash was telling a lie which any dumb-ass could catch.

'He or she, Aakash you are too sweet to lie, so stop trying it.'

'Hmm.. anyway, stop giggling and get fresh.. i don't have much time, i need to be prepared with at least a chapter by evening'

'Oh ho.. Ohk then, gimme 10 mins'

Ravi started with shares & debentures and for next 4 hours poured all of his knowledge in regarding chapter out. Aakash too grabbed it with interest more than he did for even his exams. He went back home and was waiting for Ria's call. She didn't. Tired of waiting he called her...

'Hey, whats up?'

'Nothing yaar, You know what, Daddy gave a surprise visit this morning. I did talk to mummy that you will be coming, and she agreed to it. But daddy told to keep a tuition teacher, which will be coming home.' Ria said feeling sad.

'C'mon it's good. The teacher will be nice option as only few days are left. He will be having enough knowledge, and better than me sweetie, he will have a good command on numerical and we can discuss the theory part on phone if you face any difficulty', Aakash didn't said about his hard work, cause that was of no use.

'Hmmm... but i will make you meet mummy in few days, when daddy will be going out of station again.', Ria did felt bad that she wasn't able to meet Aakash again.

'It's ohk.. you concentrate on your studies' Aakash understood her, always.

They talked for next one hour discussing about the subject and topics which were important. Ria was talking, Aakash was listening. He just loved her voice, it felt so sweet to him that it didn't matter to Aakash what she was speaking as long as she was speaking. Her voice was so tempting and kiddish that Aakash couldn't fight with her on phone, whenever he did fought, he messaged her. But not anymore. He just didn't want to fight with her, he didn't want to hurt her. She did called him next day and called him home.

Aakash was on cloud no 9, the day he met aunty.

(P.S.: Sorry for over than one year gap for Aakash Ria's story)

Feelin' Unsaid !

2011-03-04T17:44:00.001+05:30

I try to talk to you, but I don't know what to say.
I am afraid you don't want me to say anything. So I don't.

But inside of me there are thousand words waiting to come out.
And tell you how I feel-like, how much i miss you.
And how I love you despite of your ignorance.
And how i need you in my life each moment.
And especially how much i want you.

All i do is dream about you every night.. where you are mine.
Where we both are lost in each other arms, as if i would never let you go.
Where i kiss your forehead and say that i will always be beside you, always.
Where we hold hands and walk as the road will never end.

But dreams do end, and those words may forever stay in my heart-locked inside.
Sometimes I wonder if there are words locked inside you too.. but I'll never know.

{P.S. Read it somewhere, and found connections, few modifications.. :) }

Come With Me Someday Baby

2010-12-08T10:33:00.001+05:30

Come with me Someday baby

I will take you to a world of mine

Where's no sorrow, no tears

where smile will always shine

Come with me someday baby

Come to my dream land

Where you are mine forever

where you never leave my hand

Come with me someday baby

Come and get lost with me

where's no complain, no grudges

where sky is colourful and birds are free

Come with me someday baby

Someday come to my heart

Come and see what you mean to me

Where even for a second we aren't apart.

The Girl who stole my smile :(

2010-10-02T04:45:00.000+05:30

Rohan was one of the most 'irritating kid' u can meet.. At the age of 22 he still behaved like a kid and that what use to irritates normal people, until and unless u have a unconditional love or soft corner for him, as the girls did (i mentioned, normal people). He was envied by many of his mates cause of his popularity among girls. He was good at studies, ok at emotions, and so so at love.. He believed in love so much, as he was always searching for it. Searching mean, he was in love all the time, he never had a heart break or a serious feeling for his girlfriends, caz somewhere or the other they didn't fit his criteria of a perfect GF.. Some were less beautiful, some were 'miss touch me not' types, some were too much talkative, most of them were less intelligent or to be precise having no sign of intelligence. He discovered the problems in few months and made the girl realise that she was wrong until they thought, 'Rohan deserves a better girl than i am'. He didn't enjoyed the Break-ups but according to him, it was the need of hour and God had sent him for better purpose than fighting over a relationship, only till he found a better girl, (who would not be better anymore after few weeks, or months). The good part was,he didn't kept it for long, as soon as he felt that a girl is getting serious about him, he starts making his plans for the D-day, alas, the break up day.. He was a good person at heart, but his hormones always forced him to think otherwise. Of all his dozen + relationships, few of them were easily available, whom he didn't missed to avail, few of them were romantic types, time taking, and few of them after marriage types, don't touch me.. He was not looking for anyone around as his past two gf's came in the 3rd category which scared him a lot.

It was just another day of September end when rains were still visiting Delhi almost every alternate day. Rohan didn't had much to do, as his college were off for a month. Except the daily compulsory attendance at Facebook. He didn't had much friends to hang out with. But this didn't gave him a break from talking over phone. He did had friends, but most of them were from his schools with whom he could just be what he was. He always felt that after a age, u make friends according to needs, but childhood friends are always there to stay. But all his childhood friends were in different states. So hanging out was a big issue as his past gf's were so guilty about the relationship that they never called back(as he wanted). He was just surfing through net when he received a friend request by a girl who use to study in his school and had few mutual friends along with profile pic to testify her genuineness. She was looking hot, unlike school time, when she use to tie her hair on both sides. Hairs open, skirts short, nice figure, required assets, and open minded.. were few deduction made after seeing her album. He was sure that she is not virgin, by her constantly usage of the F word on her profile, whether it be, about me section, the status updates, the comments.. Suddenly scrolling down on info section something caught his attention. "Current Location : New Delhi, India." He thought here it is, his next most probable girl who was surely not like the 3rd category. He sent a message to her on FB, "hey, wassup long time, huh, wat r u doing in delhi, wat's ur no?" (to the point).. He received a reply next minute, "Hey fuck man, how are u.. Where u have been fucking around all these years, n f...... " , more F word were followed with her number at last.. As he read it, he wished that her first two-three words were the last ones, she is too talkative and only her first two-three words made sense to him. Without giving much pressure to his brains at this early stage, he took the phone and ringed her up. She picked up with a A word this time and continued the F's later on. He was sure that she was not a hard nut to crack. Before he was thinking, she asked him if they could meet up today. Being a man, he couldn't deny her. Other reasons were to support his decision like he was bored like hell and needed something fresh. He went on to take his bath, which he hadn't taken from past a week, well according to him there was no need of it, caz he was locked in a room for whole day, have to meet nobody, then why to waste water, which is already in shortage.

Dressed at his best, he reached the decided venue 15 min earlier to have a look at other hot girls who roam there, Ansal Plaza. He received her call 10 min later confirming the place he was at. As Rohan saw her, he was awestruck, she was not only hot, but she was beautiful too. She didn't only wear mini skirt but has also a tatoo on her waist showing her sun-sign. Most importantly, she didn't only had a pair of good assets but also a pair of beautiful eyes. She was hotter, prettier, sexier than his previous girls, and he was just hoping that she possesses some intelligence to support his cause of making her as his girlfriend. Rohan was about to move his hand forward to shake, but she was too fast to hug him. He felt a vibe, after long time a physical touch to erect his feelings and soft corners, as his last breakup took somewhere 2 months back, n last physical touch, 5 months back.. They talked for few minutes until they settled to have something from Mac'D and continue the chat over there. With the speed she was going Rohan was sure that she had had a breakup recently and was desperate to move on. Where as he was desperate to move in. She continued the touching of hands while talking unknowing that she was directly hitting his hormones. Rohan was getting uncomfortable as his organs were not supporting his long term cause. He controlled himself hard until they planned to meet up again, n at a more private place. Good news for the champion. They talked all the nonsense and whereabout of classmates. Virginity, dignity, affairs, crushes were in other topic discussed.

Waving off a final bye to the auto which she took to her home, Rohan turn around with a sign of relief. He sat at a Bus stop to catch the next bus back home, his mind wandering around her legs and other hyped places. He was making love to her in his mind. He was in his world until something caught his attention. A li'l girl of approx 4-5 years was crossing the road, She had no one around her, well, by her attire he could make out that she was poor enough to have relatives or family. His mind got diverted from leg piece to feeling of pity. Not much could he think about, all he could see rain starting again at its full speed. The girl was getting wet and he was getting worried if she had enough money for her medication if something happens, obviously not. She ran and came towards the bus stop to get a shelter. Shivering in her torn cloth at places, she seemed the most helpless girl around. He was feeling, if only he was rich he would have done something for orphan and poor child. His bus was standing in front of him but he was no longer in hurry to catch it, his thoughts were more nobel. He stood up to catch the bus as he knew that if he didn't catch it now, it would mean a wait for another hour. He moved on, but thought of the poor girl didn't left him.

The rain stopped next morning. He was upset about last day, n was wondering what could have happened to the girl. He moved his mind to other thing as to not to worry much, he decided to roam somewhere alone, n Ansal Plaza has been his nearest spot with much window shopping along with warn environment. When he got off at the bus stop, he saw some policemen at the other side of the road surrounded by a crowd. It was the same bus stop from where he took bus last evening. He got concerned and thought to have a look. As he went near by his heart beats were beating faster. Each inch closer he could hear the voices more clear. 'She was a poor kid', 'Must have no place to live', 'The bloody rain is now killing people(poor people, he meant)' n blah blah.. Rohan was shocked, he didn't knew that his negligence would cause a life. The cute li'l girl was dead and he could do nothing about it, not that he didn't wanted to, but he didn't put that effort to save her. It all started haunting him. He ran back home. He was feeling shameful for his no action. He was feeling like impotent. He didn't bought her home, cause he was afraid of the norms of society, or rather he was used to the ignorance attitude society has. He was feeling guilty, for the first time, though. He was not able to feel any more, all the girls he had were millions time away from his mind. The only girl he had in mind was the 5 year whom he had left to die. He felt numb, he was just not able to smile anymore...

Why is it so...?

2010-03-30T13:54:00.001+05:30

Why is it so...?

that i Sleep with the same dream every night,

and wake up to reality each morning,

knowing it was just a dream

and it can never be real, never mine.

Why is it so...?

that the more i try to forget you,

the moments we shared are more clear,

dragging me back to the same place,

where i should never have been, i feel now.

Why is it so...?

No matter, how hard i try, i can't sleep whole night

and whenever my eyes shuts, you come in my dreams

where i only try to don't let you go,

but when dream is over, you were gone long ago.

Why is it so...?

My heart beats only for you,

ignoring the pain you gave me,

knowing that you ignored my feelings for your own's,

or might be, you just had enough of me.

Why is it so...?

That i want to cry a ocean,

but tears are not coming out,

as if, they are over.

as if, they will not affect you, as always.

Why is it so...?

Each time i expressed how i feel for you,

how i can't live without you,

each time you went a li'l far from me,

now so far, that i can't even call back,

Can't even express how much i am incomplete without you...

55 Fiction - 2

2010-03-21T11:30:00.001+05:30

more I Miss You...

I don't know why i love you so much,

but i guess, i am left with no option.

Cause it's you who makes me feel complete,

even knowing that you can never be mine.

I try hard to forget those moments we shared,

More i try, more i feel for you. more I MISS YOU...

twittin'

2010-02-15T20:25:00.000+05:30

It might be Not a News for many, as twitter is from quite a time long, and i am new to it... Even i got invitations many a times back but wasn't much interested to join another social site and increase my worthless things to do list after orkut and facebook, so i ignored each time.. But as i got bored with the orkut and facebook thing, i thought to give a try to twitter, n guess what, it's really interesting.. Where in the world would u get to know when SRK goes for bath? How long Priyanka Chopra is stuck in traffic? What did Sonam Kapoor had in her lunch? How did Mallika Sherawat did her first international kiss? Did Chetan Bhagat had a Bihari girl-friend or not, n do he regret it? When do our celebs go for a nap? Well, strangely our celebs discuss it all on twitter, so i decided not to follow all of them, besides just whom i like are in my following list... Guess what, Hrithik Rohsan made his twitter account last week and he had over 15000 followers in just 15 hours, Karan Johar, Abhishek Bachahan, Genelia, etc, etc all promoting him, i mean welcoming him on twitter.. n there are few non-stop speeches by Mahesh Bhatt types.. Well twitter is much more than just celebs, it's far more useful to be updated to current happenings all over.. I came to know about German Bakery Blast in Pune through the same source, when i hardly use to tune in any news channel ever which helps me to keep away from Breaking News. All our celebrities were busy showing there sorrows over incident when Abhishek was busy promoting his Bingo. Hmm None of my business. So , i just thought what our celebs do else acting, now i got some answers atleast, he he.

And Yeah, the latest news around, Google Buzz, an combination of twitter and facebook's status updates. Google wants to rule each and every area. Buzz overall is ok. Not much about it to talk. Perhaps, i am twitting more these days than Orkutting or facebooking.. For the time being.

(P.S.: Just watched P.S. I Love You - Nice movie, few love stories are forever, even after death)

Simply Rohan - A Love Story

2010-02-06T21:26:00.005+05:30

Rohan met her after 2 weeks, she was lookin' as beautiful and sexy as ever. He knew she was a li'l bit upset with him, but she was the most understanding girlfriend anyone can have, n Rohan was definitely lucky. They use to meet almost daily and spend valuable time since they came in relationship a year back. They fought many a times, in which Rohan was usually wrong and hurted her, but every time she understood. She never complained for anything, even if Rohan talked to another girl or hang out with them, cause she trusted him and knew that Rohan was damn loyal. They use to hang out almost daily and spend as much time as they could together. Rohan friends also got jealous by seeing their love for each other, cause many a times Rohan acted as mean and selfish but his girlfriend never left his side. She supported him blindly cause he never crossed his limits, he never touched her without her permission, and never forced her for anything. Although they use to be together for countless hours, day or night, but he never tried to make love to her, cause somewhere Rohan felt that true love is free of lust and so did his sweet girlfriend. They hugged each other, holded hand for hours, waited without complains, but never did either of them thought about having Sex. Neither did they talked on phone, as they could meet each other daily, perhaps even Rohan understood that she didn't wanted to keep cell-phones, She was different than other girls, not much shopping but her demands were costly which Rohan fulfilled without any second thought. They both were in true love as any historic lovers. But for the first time, Rohan had to go out of station due to some work.

He just said her while leaving,"I love you baby, you are my life, without you many things would have been impossible for me, You are my biggest strength as well as weakness, although i don't want to leave you but i have to go.. hope u understand, i will be back asap.. take care of yourself and don't talk to strangers or go out with them, it's a mean mean world.. and i can never see you in pain.. will miss you with every breath of mine, bye..". Rohan touched her tummy and felt the softness. She didn't wanted him to go and was not leaving his hand. For the last time he holded her hand tightly, kissed on her forehead and waved a good-bye. He cared for her like hell, and loved her more then anything on this world. He didn't turned back while going, cause he knew her eyes were so damn killing that he will have to stop.

Coming back in city, Rohan was excited to meet her. He knew where she will be waiting for him. He took bath, combed his hair, dressed at his best & went at their meeting point. She was waiting for him in advance, looking elegant and damn sexy as usual, Rohan always wished to make love to her, only if she allowed. But he never wanted to raise this topic from his side as it might hurt her. Rohan went near by, touched her tummy softly, and they moved his hand toward hers.... he never even tried to touch her breast, as she might interpret wrongly... he holded her hands tightly and they both hugged each other like lovers who meet after years. Passion in their love was visible. Rohan said," How you had been all these days, you missed me naa... I missed u too baby... You know all the time i thought only about you, i don't know why i love you so much, but i can't leave without you.. forgive me for being away from you... Forget it, i always speak only about myself, u tell me.. how are you, and why are you looking so upset, now i am back, everything's fine na... say na..."

She didn't wanted to talk to him. For the first time Rohan felt that she was angry. He started searching something and found a piece of cloth near by, he took it and started cleaning her from head to toe. Whenever he did anything like that stupid, she couldn't resist herself and starts smiling, or shine comes to her face. Rohan kissed her fore-head and said," I love you baby, now shall we go, i have to go to tuitions.", Saying Rohan took out the keys from his pocket and putted it in her mouth, he turned the key to start her and then holded her right hand tightly and turned it softly, his left hand were managing her left hand. Few meters later just in 6 seconds he zoomed her to 0-100 km/hr speed and said, "That's why i love you baby, you are so damn fuckin' fast that people are bound to get jealous of us." Even Rohan never complained to her as of why she is wearing the same dress from past one years. ORANGE... his bike colour... the 'apache 160 cc Fi'..

(P.S. : Her hand stand for handle of the bike, tummy stands for oil-tank, and strangely they can never make love.. he he)

...and some more...

2010-01-15T02:17:00.004+05:30

...and some more...

...and some more... is a disease which we all suffer from, sometimes 4 good... sometimes 4 bad... mostly out of greed as we are human being and we can't have enough of literally anything.. we need more.. and some more.. and some more.. and some more.. that how we are mentally prepared, and we can't avoid it.

the idea came to me when from last many a months i was just sad unknowing the reason behind it, i was not able to figure out how to get out of my mental trauma and what was the basic problem behind all the subsequent ones... so i stopped myself from thinking about the problems which were visible and went into search for the root cause.. after weeks of survey on my own act and behaviour i realised that the reason behind my sadness is none other than my own desire which keeps on demanding and in turn complaining for stuffs which are practically irrelevant, the reason was ...and some more... whenever i have something, i need some more.. and some more.. and when i don't get that (..and some more..) i feel unwanted, dissatisfied, unhappy which results in playing the blame game.

We are bound to our desires and we act accordingly.. We make people happy, we make them smile, we make them cry, we hurt them cause of our desire.. Well, don't u guys ever feel monotonous.. feel bored of ur own emotional stuffs, the same feelings, the same complains over and over again, the same idiotic heart pinching u for expecting from others..Guysss.. really i m fed up with my emotions.. So... wats the solution??? - might be to remove emotions completely and go in solitude or why not kill oneself, the easiest way to escape from responsibilities of our own heart n mind or say.. but No.. i would say, i have searched a better solution for this disease.. i pondered over it, and thought why not do something new and properly channelise our problem into a better way, even if it's not the solution.. I say, when u do something for others it's not their problem. It's totally yours and you have no right to blame anybody else for if they don't respond.. If u still wish to do, do it for it will make u happy, not them.. N let's pull off our attitude of the blame game.. You did this, you didn't do that, You didn't called, you didn't replied..WTF.. C'mon we all have a lot of tensions which are created by own, so why to add up to it by some fuckin' emotions which is never satisfied.. here, i don't mean, emotions are bad or useless, i just mean that ur emotions are your own and don't let it down cause of ur desire of expectations.. Leave urself free of expectations and the world around you will change automatically.. You will still feel good about what u did for anybody but u won't blame him/her for anything. How cute is it.. N trust me, i have been a changed man since i realised my ..and some more.. problem, i have no regrets, no complains, as i use to have dozens in handy earlier.. now which all seems to be summarized in 3 beautiful words, "blah blah blah".. and some more.. blah blah blah..

...and some more... is just a attitude, which can be a stepping stone to success to an optimist and a stumbling block to a pessimist.. I was a li'l bit away from my optimism, so it was looking the other way round.. Fighting with emotions is not easy, then when did i said to do so.. I just mean we need to channelise our emotions in proper manner so that it doesn't becomes a burden or tension for anybody else.. we don't need to blame anybody, we don't need to always keep our complain box with our self..Let's try something different with our self, something new which no one ever expected from us.. try this out.. keep ur complain box alas blah blah blah box at home, get free of your expectations and move out.. and take along with you, love, care, forgiveness, craziness, empathy... and some more... and some more...

55 Fiction - 1

2010-01-07T14:22:00.008+05:30

Aakash was riding his 160cc bike at the slowest possible speed cause he was in no hurry... Ria said from behind,

"Shame on you... Look, that ricksaw puller is going faster than you"

Aakash felt an insult... overtaking the ricksaw puller.. stopped him and said,

"Why are you pedaling so fast, can't you go slow.."

(P.S.: My first attempt at 55 fiction. Inspiration - Mahesh & other bloggers. For those who are unaware about 55 fiction. - It is a fictitious story to be said within 55 words.)

Aakash & Ria - 2

2009-12-29T17:25:00.012+05:30

Aakash & Ria - Part 1

"Pick Up the Phone!"

"What are you doing here at this point of time? Have u gone nuts.. It's 9 PM and what will u say to ur Mom..", Aakash was shocked on Ria sudden visit at Aakash's home. Although he always wanted her to come but at this moment.. at this time.. he got concerned about her..

"Actually.. I wanted to see you.. I just saw a bad dream at evening and wanted to know about ur well-being, so i came as soon as i woke up..", Ria said catching her breath, Aakash could make out that she was not using her make-ups for the first time being out of home.. But she was looking more beautiful to him, more natural.. the Ria he dreams of.. She was just looking perfect, as usual..

"Are you Mad.. U just saw a dream n came all this way to see me... U could have called up.. i wud have come.. U knw how late it is.. What will u say to ur Mom..", Aakash was always worried about her, and didn't wanted her to face any problem because of him... ever...

" I don't know.. Aakash will u stop preaching and let me come inside..", Ria said moving Aakash from the door and entering the house.

"Ya.. But u know Aunty will get....." Before Aakash would complete his concern about Ria's Mom, Ria hugged him tightly. Aakash couldn't feel anything except Ria at the moment.. He wasn't able to speak but still he was trying... "Look, Aunty will get worried, u should be at home at this moment...."

"Will u shut-up...", Saying Ria moved her face towards his... looking directly into his eyes... she could see.. how desperate Aakash was, how much he loved her, n how he won't do anything unless she takes the initiative... Analyzing the innocence on Aakash face she moved her lips towards his and gave him a french kiss, then she started kissing him all over his face..."I love You... I always loved you... N i don't know how it all happened, but somewhere i can never think a life without u... I missed you like hell..Why didn't u called me.. Why didn't u stopped me.. Why are u like this.. You selfish Moran..U only know how u feel, but can never see my feelings..Can't u see what i don't say.. U didn't stopped me years back.. u didn't stopped me last month.. Can't u feel Aakash", Saying Ria again catched his lips for another one..

Aakash was dumbstruck... Aren't this word i always wanted to say? How can she know what i feel inside.. Did i ever said this to her?.. Questions were roaming in his mind like hell, but his lips were tuning the way Ria wished it to... He just wanted her to say that he could feel like hell.. he missed her with every breath of his.. He didn't stopped her because he wanted her to be happy.. with him.. without him.. He loves her more than anything on this planet.. Aakash had many a things to say.. but he didn't wanted to raise any topic now which might come between their kisses... He could just feel her smell, her lips, her eyes, her neck...his right hand moving at wrong places... all he said was.. "I'm Sorry..."

"Sorry is the only thing u know how to say.. My ears are waiting for others...", Ria said entangling her fingers in his left hand tightly..

"I love you and i always loved only u.. with every breath of mine.. ", Aakash was about to say a lot many feeling buried deep inside his heart from years, but he heard a ring.. His phone was ringing...

"Somebody is calling.. Pick it up...", Said Ria moving a li'l bit away and getting out of his arms....

"Let it be...", Saying Aakash pulled Ria back in his arms and started kissing again...

"Pick it up.. it might be important..."

"Nothing in this world is more important than you.."

"Pick it up for me..."

"You know i can't say NO to you..Ok lemme see...", Aakash was trying to see his phone which was ringing from over 30 seconds but couldn't find it.. He started moving his hand all over bed... But he was not on bed.. he was standing with Ria, kissing her, bounded in her arms... How come he came on bed.. He moved his hand further and he found the phone ringing below the pillow.. but he couldn't see Ria anywhere...his arms were trying to hold her but she was nowhere... Ria was gone.. with his dreams.. n he was in reality now.. she never came.. it was all a dream which he sees every now and then...

Unwillingly he picked up the phone, he was about to abuse but he controlled himself... The lady on the other line said in a computerized voice, "Dear Vodafone valuable customer, New offers specially for you on this new year...", Before listening further , he had hung up the call... The most tragic call in his most sweetest dream ever... It wasn't 9 PM.. it was his evening nap.. 5 PM he noticed on the cell...

He tried to go back in the same dream for next 5 mins.. He was trying to go at the same place where he left and wanted to complain Ria as to why she said to Pick up this idiotic call... But to no avail.. After all his failed attempts of getting back into dreams, he woke up and sat on the bed.. He didn't wanted all this to happen.. Ria was gone again from his life... n he didn't even heard her voice for more than a month by now... the irony for Aakash was, that it was his decision.. to get out of her life by hurting her... n he can't go back... But he missed her every second... He just didn't know how to say her that he can't live without her... On the other hand he was rather content that Ria was happy.. He just knew how to love her.. Not how to demand in love.. so.. he was loving her even though being away from her.. her mind, her life.. he could always meet Ria in his dreams, if not otherwise... He could always see her beautiful eyes, her cute smile.. he could always hear her innocent voice.. even though she allowed it only till his dreams... N if luck favored him, he could get closer to her like today.. But was this dreams enough for his life time n How long will he wait for her...

Grown Up or Grown Old !

2009-12-12T21:02:00.011+05:30

Well, in few hours i will loose another year from my life.. I will grow older and along with ... will have to bear more responsibilities, will have to pretend as if i gained some more experience from life in all these years, will have to stop behaving like a kid and will be expected to act smarter, to be on my words, to get serious about studies and life, will be taunted on my silly feelings, will be......... watever... When i didn't cared till 21, so what's the fuss about being 22. I love myself the way i am, i love my stupidities, i love the kid inside me, i love being called mad, crazy, idiot caz of my feelings which are quite impractical in today's scenario, i love my anger which results in hurting people till end, i love my forgiveness which allows even the most unexpected people back in my life, i love my ego which keeps my dignity in my eyes atleast, i love repeating the same mistakes again if it's give me happiness (Imagine falling in love thrice... n with the same person.. that's just a example, so don't start using ur brains), i love making complete strangers as best buddies forever (m good at it), i love my creativity which are currently limited caz of my dis-interest in everything, i just love almost everything about myself.. the only thing i wish to change is my procrastination, which is my best supporter for every circumstances... but then again, that completes me.. that's completes a Sagittarius.. the "arrey ho jayega" n "I don't care" attitude.. lol

So, am i excited or pondering over getting old.. I don't know.. Presently, am not running through a phase which should have included birthdays or celebrations, and of mine, is like keeping a fake smile through out the day without feeling it.. M i happy, or completely broken, i have no idea.. All i know is that i am missing the most precious thing in my life.. Candy.. i mean sweets, doc has advised me to have less of them as it would harm me.. but did doc know that i can't even think a life without it.. i can't even see it.. how pathetic...

On the other hand the exciting thing attached to my b'day is my "Surprise b'day party"... How a party can be surprised if it's known already, but in my case indeed it is.. Cause i have to pretend as completely surprised, taken a back, as my Mom n Dad are visiting Delhi tomorrow to surprise me... 'Surprise me' cause they didn't told me about it, rather they lied that they would be coming by 20th of this month.. But my sweet n caring bro had to leak out the news as i was planning a party with friends, which i hardly needed.. Last year on the same great day, i had surprised my Mom n Dad by going at their place in Nagaland without informing them, so it's a pay-back time.. They were more than happy on my surprise visit and even i have the same feeling although it's no longer a surprise for me.. So, lets see, if i am good at acting or not... I love You Mom & Dad - You Guys mean the world to me, Bro u r also included along with missin' candy in my world...

Hmmm... So i would also like to mention about 'Paa..' - A movie which touched my heart, by not it's story but by class acting by Senior AB.. He can make jealous to any of the actor who pretend to be King in bollywood.. no intention to hurt any personal feelings... Although the movie was very good and Junior AB has also learned some acting skills by now, but the show we watched @ 11pm, had just we as the viewer... It gave a feeling like, as if we booked the multiplex as a hi-fi minister or something.. However, we enjoyed the movie alot.. Amit Ji Rockssss...

Last but not the least, '2 States' by Chetan Bhagat.. I thought to write my blog after i complete this novel, but i m in midway, n i wanted to discuss about many a thing else, so can't give my complete review on the book... This has been first time when i have not completed a CB book in one go... I did with all three earlier, Five Point Someone, One Night @ the call center, 3 Mistakes of my Life... But now my life has become such a mess, due to Job n all, that i can't think of that... Anyways... I like CB's way of narrating his stories, cause somewhere i can find a rhythm between his n mine way of saying something... he he.. Although he has far more observing power n he earns a tag of IIT-D n IIM-A, which i m still dreaming of... CB always wanted to become a writer n i haven't decided what to do with my life, he wanted to bring a change in India through his pen, which i guess, he has tried his best... Love ya CB... Anyhow, i would like to mention few lines which i won't forget even i keep the book away from my sight...

"Why would any guy want to be friends with a girl? It's like agreeing to be near a chocolate cake and never eat it. It's like sitting in a racing car but not driving it..." So damn funny n true in cases where u like the girl.

"Who the fuck invented the word sorry? How can there be just one word to answer anything one does....", True again...

Even it would be silly to compare myself with such huge talent India has, but we have one similarity, which i felt connection with... When Krish (male lead) was asked about which company he wants to join once he passes out from IIM-A by Ananya (his girlfriend), Krish answers... WPM..

"What's WPM"

"Whoever Pays More"...WPM

I follow the same policy : "If u want Loyalty, get a dog.. I work for Money.."

Aakash & Ria - 1

2009-11-14T23:53:00.012+05:30

"Eating Gol-gappe is not a piece of cake!"

Aakash had to run back 3 kms to get his bike as Ria wanted to have Gol-gappe... He had parked his bike near Ria's house and came near her office, as she told last evening while Ria called him up on her way to home from office, that how good it would have been if they walked together, n walking has it's own benefits... Aakash didn't understood any other benefit except spending time with her and he decided that as soon as he get's time he will walk with her till her home.. N for Ria he can bend any time in his favour..

Today whole day he was busy with office work but his mind was constantly roaming on how to reach Ria's office.. He decided it yesterday only, that he will be reaching Ria's office at 5:30 and wait for her to wind up her work and come by 5:45 n then they would walk together till her home.. By 4:00pm he made a excuse and left his office and rode his bike as fast he could in traffic and reached near Ria's home by 5:00.. He parked the bike in a market near by her home and ran to her office.. When he was about to reach Ria's office he looked at the watch, it was 5:25, he called her up..

"Hey.. Wassup..."

"Nothing special, m in office and getting bore.."

"Ok.. So how was the day.."

"So so.. M just getting done with some pending stuff, in 10 mins, will go home.."

"Would you mind if i walk with u you till your home.."

"What???? where are you??"

"Just near your office... You only told yesterday that how good it would have been if we walked together, i just thought to give u company, if it's k with you..."

"You are totally mad... I was just kidding... I can't believe you Idiot..Where's ur bike???"

"I know i am mad, n u know that's only for you... I have parked the bike near by your home... So how long will u make me wait.."

"I don't know what makes u so sure that i will walk with u.. N today as u came i don't wanna walk and waste time.. rather i want to have Gol-gappe.. it's in another market... It has been long time... Go get ur bike and come, i m waiting.."

"What?? I ran 3 kms to walk with u and now u r saying that u don't wanna walk today... U wanna have some idiotic Gol-gappe thing..."

"I don't know anything.. I want to have it means i want to have it.. Go n get ur bike asap.. else i will get late.."

"I am outside ur office, r u sure u want me to run again..."

"Obviously i am.. It's a question of Gol-gappe and i don't want to compromise... make it soon"

Saying this Ria hunged up and Aakash started running again... back to her home.. to get the bike... he liked her kiddish demands, infact he was mad about her.. he loved everything she said, so he didn't mind running again n this time he had to run faster... his legs were paining, but it was not more than his madness..

Getting his bike he rode it again faster and came near her office and called her up...

"In your service mam.. Now how much time u r gonna make me wait..."

"5 more mins.. M just coming"

Aakash never minded waiting for her, caz whenever he saw her smile and eyes all his anger melted like ice-cream.. He waited for another 10 mins when she came and give a weird smile to him... She was looking awesomely beautiful in suits.. just like 6 and half years back when he had first seen her.. He could resist everything on this planet except her cuteness...

"You know, u are maddest person i have ever seen... Do u have any sort of thing named as brain", Sitting on his bike said Ria

"No sweetie.. I love being the maddest person till u like my stupidities...", Zooming the accelerator replied Aakash

"I would never say again anything to u even as a joke, u take things too seriously..."

"I just take u seriously baby...So u made me run twice.. huh.."

"Your mistake, u should have called earlier that u r coming..."

"I know.. But i just wanted to give u surprise unknowing i would be surprised.. anyways, here comes your Gol-gappe.."Saying Aakash parked his bike near the Gol-gappe walla..

Ria ordered for Gol-gappe and Aakash was busy seeing her.. He can never have enough of her, her cuteness, her beauty, her smile, her eyes, her voice... He could do anything to see her more often(rather daily) than once in a two month, as it happened... But he couldn't help it unless Ria wanted the same.. He hardly gets the courage to call her up when he comes near by her office or home, just to have a look of her... But he never wanted to bother Ria, so he never told that he waits for her, almost every alternate day...

They had Gol-gappe and started to head towards Ria's home... Sitting again on his sexy bike Ria said, "Now i don't fear sitting behind u, earlier i use to..."

"Just because i ride at my slowest speed when u are at the back seat..ask my other friends, who keep their hand on chest when i zoom my machine"

"Why do u drive slow when i sit on ur bike?", Ria asked feeling jealous of the bike, cause she knew other than her if Aakash was mad about anything, it was always his bike...

"So that, i can spend more time with u... i mean, when u seat at the back i never want the destination to come..."

"Ahhh haa haa.. So sweet..."

"I know, I am the sweetest thing.. ", said Aaksh shivering in the cold waves, he missed to wear his jacket, or rather he didn't wanted to come anything between their closeness, few clothes which he can never help were always between them...

"Isn't it cold.. U are feeling cold then y don't u take ur Jacket stupid..", Said Ria moving her hand towards his chest to give him a li'l bit warmth..

"I just forgot..", Saying Aakash tried to entangle his fingers in hers with his left hand..

"Ur hand is too cold...", Ria said removing her hand from his chest and keeping it on his shoulder.. She knew that it was wrong, Aakash would take her otherwise, N she didn't loved him and she didn't wanted Aakash to feel anything which she doesn't feel for him... So she removed her hand silently.. Although Aakash wanted to feel her, hug her.. desperately.... but he understood her dilemma and didn't said anything, rather he was cursing himself for his movement... Dropping her two blocks ahead from her home Aakash wished that he could have undone things 5 years back.. If he didn't ignored his own feelings years back then Ria would have never gone away from him.. Aakash was ready to do anything, if he could go back in past and mend his ignorance... He loved her from the time, he had ever known love, from last 6 and half years... But now he didn't wanted his love to come between their so called friendship.. He realised a month back, that however hard he tries he can't imagine a life without her being around.. and he was happy doing whatever it takes for her happiness.. His love was not his priority, Ria's happiness was...

"Good night n take care"

"U too take care", saying Ria vanished...

Aakash zoomed again back to his normal speed of above 70kmph... All his way to his home Aakash was just lost in her eyes, her smile, her voice.. He could do anything for her.. He went nostalgic about when he first holded Ria's hand, 6 and a half years back... That day, Aakash removed his hand himself...

To read what happened 6 and a half years back... click here...

To read the whole story of Aakash and Ria... click here...

What M i Busy With???

2009-11-05T23:00:00.010+05:30

Making Money on Farmville & Cafeworld, n things like which are too kiddish to mention... I hope every1 is aware of the first two.. Don't say no.. Caz they are the most talked about features these days on Facebook besides Mafia Wars.. Although i have joined mafia also but i believe in self employing rather than winning money by fighting n makin' Mafia.. My Mom would kill me if she comes to know that i have even joined Mafia.. Jokes Apart.. These are the games which keeps us busy throughout the day... Cooking n serving on time period of the related dish, else the dish will get wasted... Harvesting crops on time...I call my (few)neighbors in both the games if their food n crops are ready.. N i can't believe i enjoy it... this stupidity.. But there a kid in each one of us... Might be for the time being i am so bored of my life that i enjoy these games.. Never Mind...

What i really wanted to share was the heart touching songs of Ajab Prem ki Gazab Kahani... From Past one month i have been just humming these songs, (Tu jaane na, being my favorite) N believe me guys after a long time i heard a album which can be said as complete, in romantic sense.. So lemme mention few lyrics which are meaningful(might be from my side)..

1. Tera Hone Laga hoon(Romantic):

Shining in the shade in sun like a pearl up on the ocean, Come and feel me, Haan Feel me
Shining in the shade in sun like a pearl up on the ocean, Come and heal me, Comon Heal me....
...Phele bhi raaton mein, Aksar hi chahat ke haan, Sapne Sanjota tha,

Phele bhi dhadkan yeh, Dhun koi gaati thi, Par abb jo hota hai woh, Phele na hota tha....

....Annkhon Se Chuu Loon Ki, Bahein Tarasti Hain, Dil Ne Pukara Hai Haan, Abb Tu Chale Aao
Aao To Shabnam Ki Boodein Barasti Hain, Mausam Ishara Hai Haan, Aab To Chale Aoo......
....Tera Hone Laga Hoon, Khone Laga Hoon, Jab Se Mila Hoon

2. Prem Ki Naiyaa(Peppy Track):

Prem ki naaiya hai ram ke bharose, APni e naaiya ko paar tu lagai de....
...Kahin to hoga koi upaaye, Ki meri tu ho jaye,
Chahe Mujhko tu bhi Umar bhar, Karun mein kya
Kya mantar padhu mein, Kya tantar karu mein,
Aankhon ki chahat tujhe bhi dekhai de...

3. Main tera Dhadkan Teri(Funny):

Main Tera Dhadkan Teri, Yeh Din Tere,Raatein Teri..
Ab Bacha Kya,Ab Bacha Kya

....Kuch Yaar nazar nahi aata, ghar baar nazar nahi aata,
Sansaar nazar nahi aata.. jab pyaar hota hai..

4.Tu Janne Na( I can't mention few lines out of it, caz the whole song leaves me numb):

Kaise Batayein, Kyu Tujh ko Chahe, Yaara bata na Paaye
Baatein dil o ki, Dekho Jo Baaki, Aankhein tujhe Samjhaye
Tu Jaane Na, Tu Jaane Na, Tu Jaane Na, Tu Jaane Na

mil ke bhi, Hum na Mile, tumse na jaane Kyu, Milo ke hai Fansle..Tumse Na jaane kyu

Anjaane Hai SilSile, Tum Se Na Jaane Kyu, Sapno hai Palko Tale, Tum Se Na Jaane Kyu,

Nigahon mein dekho, jo hai bas gaya, woh hai milta tumse, hu ba hu..

Jaane teri Aankhein thi, ya baatein thi, Wajah.. hue tum jo, dil ki aarzoo

hum pass ho ke bhi, tum aas ho ke bhi, ehsaas ho ke bhi... apne nahi..

aise hai hum ko gileh.. tumse najaane kyu..

meelo ke hai fansle , tum se na jaane kyu.. tu jaane na..tu jaane na..

Khyalon mein laakohn baatein, yu toh keh gaya, bola kuch na tere sahmney...
hue na begaane bhi tum hoke aur ke, dekho tum na mere hi bane..
afsos hota hai, dil bhi yeh rota hai..Sapne sanjota hoa..pagla hua,

soche yeh..hum the mile ,unse se na jaane kyu,

meelo ke hai fansle, tum se na jaane kyu..

anjaane hai silsile, tumse najaane kyu, sapne hai palko tale, tumse najaane kyu..

Kaise Batayein, Kyu Tujh ko Chahe, Yaara bata na Paaye
Baatein dil o ki, Dekho Jo Baaki, Aankhein tujhe Samjhaye

Tu Jaane Na, Tu Jaane Na..

Listen to this track, n i bet u l fall in love with it, whether in Kailash Kher or Atif Aslam's Voice... Today Ajab Prem Ki Gazab Kahani is hitting the theaters, i n m dying to watch it with ajab gazab person(Top Secret, he he).. Ranbir was cool in Wake Up Sid n Katrina doesn't need words to describe her beauty...

At end, Soon i m about to join my long awaited Career Launcher classes for CAT exams( For those who are still unaware.. CAT exams is first step to get admitted in IIM's(Indian Institute of Management), N that's my only dream, as of now.. So, m excited.. Just Pray for me guys that i get rid of these idiotic games n concentrate on my career.. N yeah, the latest buzzzz... The New Orkut... Currently in beta phase, so only applicable on invitations.. like facebok, u can comment on status n all... Let's Wait n Watch..

I Read Your Eyes !

2009-10-21T23:55:00.000+05:30

I lost my heart in those eyes,

I lost my mind in those eyes,

People say eyes can kill,

But i m not dead,
I can die for those eyes 100 times, i feel.

You say nothing,

still i read a lot.

Your eyes tell me to look better,

or is it my insecurity?

I don't know why,

I get feelings to look at my best,

Whenever i have to face those damn killer eyes.

You say nothing,

still i want to read a lot...

Your actions makes me feel unwanted,

Then Y those eyes say that u need me.

Your words hurt me alot sometimes,

But those eyes confesses, it wasn't intended,

infact it can never be..

You say nothing,

still do i really read a lot?

Sometimes You don't need words to say,

You trust me, even if i shout at u

You missed me, when i was not there

You want me to be with u, when things go apart

You want me to express, which i never do

You say nothing,

still i try to read a lot.

{P.S. : This post is dedicated to a cute friend of mine who is not in good health, as of now. Dear, You are the cuttest thing on this planet and will always be and try to forgive me for all the time i hurted u(i knw u always did). Take care as one of ur stupid friend is always worried.}

My Passion - Procrastination

2009-10-16T00:58:00.000+05:30

He slept beneath the moon
he basked beneath the sun
he lived a life of going to do
and died with nothing done.
-james albery

I suppose we all have procrastinated things at some time in our lives but as of me, i am used to it. Being a Sagittarius, i love the phrase "arrey, ho jayega", n i have lived all my life in these words. I believe procrastination is not an easy task, it takes alot of courage to procrastinate your studies when u have ur board exams in next few hours n u are prepared with nothing yet. lol.. It's not only because of procrastination that i suffer all the time, sometimes it is also due to my over-confidence. Delayin' anything is not easy but delayin' almost everything definitely is.. n i come in 2nd category.. Whenever i plan things, i know i will mess it up.. I better live life spontaneously.. but there are times when we just wish that we didn't had procrastinated it.. So, i would like to share few of my gr8 experience with this not so gr8 habit of mine..

1. As a kid, i was frustrated with mom's nagging over li'l things, like stop watchin' TV, atleast have a look at ur books, eat food on time - n i wanted to run away, i decided, thrice i left the house, but everytime after reaching few miles, i procrastinated the idea for next time.
Reason: My kiddisness
Outcome: 'Thanx to my smart mind which stopped me, else i wouldn't be here'

2. As a teenage, i wanted to do something unique, to gain attention from my peers.. i did got attention, but 4 all the wicked reasons. All the good reasons i thought of , i procrastinated.
Reason: Being Notorious is easy than being Studious
Outcome:'No regrets, atleast i got famous'

3. When i grew up, i just wanted to become somethin' , sometimes doctor, sometimes actor, sometimes businessman, sometimes teacher, painter, photographer, sometimes many a things at a time - i got so confused that i procrastinated every thing.
Reason: My intelligence, which generated my interest in every field, but only upto a limit.
Outcome: 'Still, the decision is in process, just few doors are closed'

4. When i fell in love, i was ready to do everything for her - everythin' has such a wide and vague scope that i didn't know what to do ExaCtLy. I procrastinated everythin', even proving that i truly love.
Reason: Ego or Ignorance, Look Still Confused!
Outcome: 'No comments Mr. Procrastinator'

5. Whenever my exams came i planned a schedule, from the time i was in Std.6th till date, which has never been followed, - Just another schedule was prepared within 24 hours until the exams got over.
Reason: I have a weak memory for studies, so last moment, was the best moment.
Outcome:'It always boosted my confidence, that if i can score decent marks without my even 10% effort, i can do wonders if ever i don't procrastinate my schedule, next time.. OMG, when will that day come'

6. I wanted to crack CAT(Not so Common Aptitude Test) when i was in college n get admitted in IIM. I procrastinated it n today i m writing it with a hope that i don't delay it one more year.
Reason: Confusion, n Graduation
Outcome:'I will be sittin' for next years CAT, if only.. I know i will crack it, Someday or next year itself'

7. I lost many of my valuable clothes just because i procrastinated to wash it on time.. Imagine a shirt being soaked in water for a week.. N everyday me sayin' will wash it tomorrow until some smells started bothering neighbors.
Reason: I am busy, have other imp work as well.
Outcome:'I know it sucks...I'll have to take care in this matter atleast'

8. I got conscious about my weight 3 years back, when i was denied to donate blood due to my underweight..
Reason: Did't had much time to cook, or to eat on time.
Outcome: 'I m still swingin' in 50's, hope to get in 60's league in few months'

9. Many of my ideas have been lost or not presented in my blog, just becoz.. I Procrastinated.

So, What i believe is procrastination can't be avoided, it completes me. On the contrary, there are few thing where we should make the habit of "doing it now"...else we can just regret it later. We should learn to accept responsibilities and take the charge. We can't always wait for things to happen, sometimes we have to make it happen. Someone who hasn't revealed his identity had said once -

“Procrastination is like masturbation. At first it feels good, but in the end you’re only screwing yourself. ”

I mean, after sayin' such a motivational quote how can anyone hide himself. lolz

Procrastination sometimes is termed as a disease, but it is also favourable at times. Else i would have left home in my kiddies. Would like to know any memorable experience with this habit of urs, if any and definitely the excuses or reasons u guys prepare. It tough to think of the excuses as well, ain't it? And as of me...

“Procrastination is my sin. It brings me naught but sorrow. I know that I should stop it. In fact, I will – tomorrow!” - An Optimist

I Say i m Selfish

2009-10-10T11:45:00.001+05:30

“It is not because the truth is too difficult to see that we make mistakes... we make mistakes because the easiest and most comfortable course for us is to seek insight where it accords with our emotions - especially selfish ones.”

We all are born selfish, whether we admit it or not. No one lives for anybody else n everybody expects others to live for them. That is how we are called human. Selfishness is devotion to or concern with one's own advantage or welfare to the exclusion of regard for others. Science and religion both teach selfishness. Selfishness results from the original sin of separation.It is the stinginess resulting from a concern for your own welfare and a disregard of others. We love anybody because that person makes us feel good, we feel better talking to them, sharing something with them, spending time with them, never because that person loves us. In today's dictionary 'LOVE' in itself means selfishness where we just stop caring about the rest of world except one person, neglecting the fact that we are just caring about our feelings not even that one person. But as human nature goes, we will still pretend that we love them.

Personally speakin' I have been a selfish being all my life, in practice, though not in principle. My so called principles and morals always said me that i am living for others and i hardly think about my own self, which is never true.

I say i care, i show i care, but when it is not valued don't i start barking it aloud to the whole world just proving that in reality i hardly care.

I say i love, i show i love, but when i am not loved in return don't i cry infront of others making that person culprit.

I say i need you, i show i need you, but when i feel ingnored don't i change my needs to drinks and smokin'.

I say i don't wanna hurt you, but don't i hurt you by repeating this phrase millions of time when you are just not interested.

I say i miss you, i show i miss you, but when you don't reply being busy with some serious stuff, don't i stop saying it next time.

I say i understand, i show i understand, but when you don't understand sometimes, don't i start making an issue.

I say i just want your happiness, but don't i become a hurdle when i see you being happy with someone else.

I say i m sorry, i show m sorry, but do i really mean it, when i keep on repeating the same mistakes again and again.

I say i l manage, i pretend i l manage, when i can't manage my emotions how can i say the same about life.

I say i don't give a damn, when i m obsessed with only that thing, m i not just keeping my ego at priority.

I say i don't cry, i pretend i never do, but why my pillow is wet most of the times.

I should better say i m selfish as any other human being rather pretending that i live for others, as if i m not human.

“Thinking more than others about our own thoughts is not self-centeredness. It means that if asked what’s on our mind, we are less likely to mention being aware of the world around us, and more likely to mention our inner reflections.”

I can't figure out that like me even you all are selfish, but this is me and according to me being selfish is not crime, unless you are hurting others for your selfishness. I just wish that my selfishness doesn't comes in others happiness, rather in there's about whom atleast i care or pretend to care.

(P.J. : I will be selfish untill i plan to settle down in himalayas.)

Lost & Found - A tribute!

2009-09-21T23:23:00.000+05:30

So, i was searching something to write on.. But there were so much things goin' around that i couldn't decide on whether i should discuss about the tiring ride of 150+ km a day(wouldn't have been possible without mah apache), the fuckin' traffic(the hours spend for reaching a 10min distance), the steering wheels in stupid girls hand(who told that women can ride cars, two minor mishaps, and still attitude, huh? a girl had to end up with me showing her mah middle finger), the 200bucks bribe to traffic police(that too after negotiation, his deal was 1100 for dangerous driving, i just wish that i had his revolver), my bad financial condition(too bad to even mention), my unstable mind(pendulum, u see) or my not so creative creativity(with which i would end up with another boring post).

I thought that i would dedicate this post to a old friend of mine, with whom i m not in touch since long time, communication gap u know.. Anyways, what is bothering me is that my friend has lost the creative bird inside... somehow, as far as i had seen when we were in touch.. Creativity has a lot of value, who else better than me would understand it. As we say, we value things once we don't have it, and i never had this thing. Going through my old documents i just came through this poem which showed a lovers perception in her teens. If by any chance my friend visits this, i would just like to express that "You rOcK ma frIeNd" , don't let your creativity die by lame words like, i don't know how to express myself or what to say.. I'll always miss You n your talent as well, which always gave me encouragement...

Here it is,

"Why does it feels so good?
Why do I feel that I love you?
Is it a sweet old dream,
or is it really true?

How come I keep loving You?
how come i always see myself with you?
Is this my wild Imagination,
Or is this really you?

Why does it feels so good on being with u?
Why do i feel that i can leave the world for u?
Wouldn't it be perfect,
I you say, "I love you"

How come is my dreams I only see u?
How come I really dream about u?
Is it really true,
that i love You.

I think so becoz I know,
You are my dreams come true.
That's why is the whole world,
"I love only you"

Becoz you mean so much to me,
Becoz I love you So,
Becoz your love has given me,
The greatest joy I ever know.

Becoz you are such a part of me,
of all i think and do,
It will take a lifetime just to show,
How dearly, I Love You."

When Will You Die!

2009-09-15T22:43:00.000+05:30

Facebook Declaration:

Atulya just found out the Death's Time:

Date: April 8 of 2010 at 11:58 pm.
Cause: Failed bunggie jumping
Age: 22 years old!

When will you die?

Facebook is up again with a new application to keep your mind busy. That happens every next day, unlike orkut which is just related to friends and communities ‘facebook offers a sack full of shits which is very helpful in wasting your precious time quite smartly. I have got to hear innovative quiz like How much Kaminney You really are? When will you marry? Mafia wars, How much hot is your name? blah blah blah.. So, this new quiz attracted me as every1 is eager to know about their future without paying to those Hippocrates tan-tricks and pandits. They really suck as they choose this profession of fooling others when they are capable of doing literally nothing. {No personal offence}

Using another application on facebook I hardly had any idea that God listens to me. I mean he really does, whenever I ask him something against me. He fulfils it asap. On the contrary when I wish something for myself he runs away sayin' ‘am too busy, catch ya later! cia!!’. How MEAN.. but he is God and we sudn’t argue. I never do, I just calm myself with 3 b’ful words “it doesn’t exist”. So Mr. Facebook just asked my birthdate and decided when I should leave this world. Interesting, Must Say!!

Coming back to my death which as predicted is just few months away, and gosssshhh where the hell would I get to do bungeeie jumping at 2 minutes to midnight. I am really excited as this will be 1^st experience of dying. N being honest I love to challenge death, with my speed which has crossed 130kmph mark, death always lost so I am writing, if I continue to write after 8^th of April, I would again win as always. Lets See, I am really looking forward to it…

Meanwhile, I am making a plan of doing things which I always wanted from life in next 6 months, God forbid if the prediction comes true. Here it goes, the things I really want to do before I die.

1. Look good: Though I never accept it but I know I look awful. Being lazy and ignorance are two prime factors for my awesomely awful looks. I just want to gain some weight, which is around 70kg in next 6 months. What if I didn’t lived healthy, I wanna die healthy. {Statutory Precaution: Don't trust my words above, Sometimes i can look exceptionally cute.}

2. Learn dance: I don’t know why I never expressed it but I feel vibes in me. I love street dancing, break dancing and romantic dance (though I don’t have a partner).

3. Learn martial arts: Karate has been a passion from my childhood, if only I just had ever pushed myself a li’l bit more I could have learned it years back.

4. Own a business of my own where I M D BOSS: Practically not possible in six months.

5. Learn swimming: I got saved two times from drowning in my teenage. I just want kill the fear of mine.

6. Get my hairs straight: Though it looks good sometimes but I am really fed up of my curls. Whenever I want to grow my hair long, it is really hard to manage.

7. Learn some manners: I lack it really, I mean how to respect elders and how to live with a joint family are things I never thought of.

8. Express Myself: I never expressed my care, my love to anyone, or whatever I did was just not enough. Rather I never thought it as important unless I lost everything except hope. All thanks to my best “bad timing”, I m born with it.

9. Mom: Oh, I always wanted to give her a lavishing life. 6 months is too short to fulfil her dreams which I have seen. Bro might help in it. So, sowweee Mom!!

10. Bhaiya’s Wedding: Now don’t trash me for this bro, but I want to see her and only her as my bhabhi, asap.

11. Sorry: I don’t mind saying sorry’s to people who matter or ever mattered to me. People close to me know me well, and they might know that none of my intensions were ever to hurt them.

12. Get rid of I don’t care attitude: So I have this as my punch line. But trust me guys I do care, just that I fear to show it.. I fear that my care will hurt you or if u don’t care about my care it will hurt me. (Ahhh.. So Complex)

13. Fame: I wish to get known for something good I have done in life, so that my parents can proudly say.. “He was MY Son”

14. Live up to my name: Atulya = incomparable, incredible, etc etc. Although I receive these comments often, but sometimes for my bad behaviour or my unseriousness towards life. Watever, I love mah name.

15. Get Lost On an island: Stupid One! But one of my wildest dreams is to get lost in an world where only two people survives. Me and My Love (in waiting).

16. Get balanced: Pendulum, suggested by Raj and followed by atulya, m tired of it. I want to get balanced composure of things in my life which can make life a bit simpler & easier.

17. Prove Someone:

Somebody wants you

Somebody needs you

Somebody dreams about you every single night

Somebody can't breath without you, it's lonely

Somebody hopes that someday you will see

That Somebody's Me …

Nice song na.. Enrique Rocks!!! Just want to prove not someone but everyone that I am not a bathroom singer, even I CAN SING!!

18. Loose Something: I have lost many a things in life, some due to weak memory, some due to ignorance and mostly due to negligence. But being 21 i wish to loose one more thing. Virginity. What? I m still virgin!! OMG.. But still I would prefer making love rather than having S.. something.. I mean.. Precisely.. Uff, Save me, it getting intricate.. Forget it…

19. Get a PUG: Remember the Hutch is now Vodafone Dog! I really wanna have it for getting my things done, like searching tie, shocks, waking me up, keeping my book open at the right page.. Sounds selfish na…

20.In end..... I wanna be 18 till I Die!

21. I wanna go for bunggie jumping on 8th of April, 2010 at 11:57pm... lolz

Movies that changed my life!!!

2009-06-28T21:18:00.000+05:30

Annoying but truth is movies do have have impact on our life, only if we watch it seriously, n the reason i got to discuss n share this view is today i watched a movie which gave me jitters...

"Haal-e-dil"

As my mundane boring routine, i switched on the television n just for passing my valuable time i thought to give this movie a try.. as i watched it seriously from head to toe, at the end i realised that what a bullshit n meaningless my life has become.. For those who r interpreting me wrong n r giving a thought to watch this flick that it might give some message, m hearteadly sorry caz whole of the movie was completely crap.. it bound me to give a thought that how the f**k can i waste 3 hours with a such a irratiting acting n no script.. why m i forcing myself to watch movies like this, istead of doing something productive...

2 days back one of my dear frend Kapil dragged me to watch "PAYING GUEST", senseless comedy n wastage of 280 bucks was wat i ended with.. the actors were trying hard to bring a smile on audience faces but they barely realised during making of the movie dat the audience will try hard to stop their tears about the amount of money invested, n regarding me i was rather in deep thought as how to manage the budget of next month as i had already become pennyless..

So there are many more movies which really confuses me for if movies r really meant for entertainment .. to mention further some of the blockbusters like singh is king n welcome which is shown almost every 2nd day on either NDTV imagine or colours or star plus, gold.. Crap man.. there's a limit to check audience patience ..

c'mon guys, give me a break n thanx for making such meaningless movies, atleast a time will come when we stop paying our hard labour on these shits.. N i hope that atleast i wud start doing sumthing productive better than watching those holy shits...

would love to know ur experiences with some disasterous movies which either changed ur life or even u gave a second thought b4 watching n wasting ur valuable money n tym..

'Take Lite'

2009-05-08T17:03:00.000+05:30

"Human brain is the most
outstanding object in world.
It functions 24 hours a day,
365 days a year.
It functions right from the time we are born,
and stop only when we enter the examination hall।"

!!
So here, my final semester exams are goin' on... m tryin' hard to concentrate for few days on my studies, pushin' myself to books again and again though m not willin' to, as i hate forces which compell but as all knows exams cant be escaped. We have to face it at every sphere whether we like it or not...

So y don't i put some funny quotes to describe exactly how i, rather i sud say 'we' feel durin' our horrified moments...

take it lite guys, they(exams) r not monsters 'just another bad n tough phase of our life'!!!

Personally speakin' i never ever took tension of papers(includin board exams) evn if m not prepared for a drop out of ocean... caz i never took it as a parameter to judge one's acumen... n this blog is not to describe how exactly i feel but rather just to take a chill pill...

eXams are there,
at the paper u stare;
the answer is nowhere,
which makes u pull ur hair.
The teachers make u glare,
the grades r not fair,
but just like the past 20 yrs,
WE DONT CARE

"Exams ke 4 din pehle syllabus dekha to yaad aaya,
Kuch To Hua Hai Kuch Ho Gaya Hai,
Exams ke din paper dekh kar yaad aaya,
Sab Kuch Alag Hai Sab Kuch Naya hai

"Baap:
Itne kum marks..??
2 thappar lagne chahiyen.!!

Beta: Han papa!
mein nay to us kameenay mastar
ka ghar bhi dekh liya hay…!!"

Wats d height of hope??
It is: sittin in d exam hall,
holdin d question paper in hand
n tellin ur self
“dude,dnt worry.
Exams wil get postponed!”

Exams are like GIRL FRIENDS;

1,Too Many Questions.

2,Difficult to Understand.

3,More Explanation is Needed.

4,Result is always FAIL!

Somethin' technical :

.4 Years Of Study.

50 Gb Syllabus

50 Mb We Study

50 Kb We Remember

50 Bytes We Answer

Binary Marks Get

This Is Known As BRAIN EMPTY [B।E] … (=

Atlast, a standin' ovation to the song for our mothers.....

"मैं कभी बतलाता नहीं... पर semester से डरता हूँ मैं माँ ...|
यूं तो मैं दिखलाता नहीं ... grades की परवाह करता हूँ मैं माँ ..|
तुझे सब है पता ....है न माँ ||

किताबों में ...यूं न छोडो मुझे..
chapters के नाम भी न बतला पाऊँ माँ |
वह भी तो ...इतने सारे हैं....
याद भी अब तो आ न पाएं माँ ...|

क्या इतना गधा हूँ मैं माँ ..
क्या इतना गधा हूँ मैं माँ ..||

जब भी कभी ..invigilator मुझे ..
जो गौर से ..आँखों से घूरता है माँ ...
मेरी नज़र ..ढूंढे qstn paper...सोचूं यही ..
कोई सवाल तो बन जायेगा.....||

उनसे में ...यह कहता नहीं ..बगल वाले से टापता हूँ मैं माँ |
चेहरे पे ...आने देता नहीं...दिल ही दिल में घबराता हूँ माँ ||

तुझे सब है पता .. है न माँ ..|
तुझे सब है पता ..है न माँ ..||

मैं कभी बतलाता नहीं... par semester से डरता हूँ मैं माँ ...|
यूं तो मैं दिखलाता नहीं ... grades की परवाह करता हूँ मैं माँ ..|"

So Guys u r most welcome to present ur point of view on this not so very important but compulsory topic in ur life...

no intentions to hurt ne serious studious students sentiment!! :-)

Kamakhya Mandir - a business in name of God!

2009-02-03T19:34:00.000+05:30

I had visited kamakhya temple on 1st of jan n i was really dying to share the business made out in the name of god.... there z a general line, a 101 rs line n a 501 rs line.... u can directly worship god if u r rich enough to pay for 'direct darshan' as they say it for 501 line... n u will hv to wait 4 few hours as we did if u belong to sum middle class family... n mind it, if u r poor or in no mood to pay for darshan then u l definitely have to wait for half a dozen hours(atleast)... n dere are more than 10000 visiters a day, increasing d number on special occasions... so what do they do with all these money, they said that it goes to committee of the temple, but when v went inside the condition was crying that the temple hasn't been cleaned for years... so they are richer dan many of the working class members by just humming some rituals... so guys not getting a job can apply over there, n dont worry abt salary atleast....

I was moved when a old couple just came to visit the temple from jammu n they managed to get into the 100 rs line but due to there age they were not able to tolerate the pain of standin' n they quitted the plan for the darshan... n i was also taken a back when two beautiful lookin girl were getting the entry in general line in midway by her pandits, so dat they don't have to stand in d long queue.... n dere r many more incidents which is better kept unsaid...

After waiting for somewhr around 4-5 hours we got our chance to have our darshan... inside the scenario was not one which a god's place should have... Near all d statue of god there was a pandit waiting for people to pass on god's blessings with some money in return... n if u giving 11rs or nothing then god is not going to bless u properly... u must give a 3figure or more in order to get the 'kripa' of bhagwan... n mind it, u cant do ur pooja on ne statue for long else d pandit will throw u away... u wont believe it but i have seen pandits pushing away ladies forcefully who were asking there wills(mannats) from god... after waiting for so long u still have a time limit to worship god...

Y is dis sort of bias in our country????

What business do people do in the name of God????

Does God really appreciate this sort of behaviour by his representatives????

Personally speaking i m an atheist from my childhood, i just went there bcaz of my mom, who z a die hard 'bakht' of every God u can name of... but this incident proved my disbelief, if God existed he would have never allowed ne1 to do business on his name... But it all hardly matter cazs indians r highly spiritual n we can't help it... if we get something in our life, we pass on the credit to God n luck instead of believing in oneself, n if we falter we blame d same on God n luck...

At least i take my good n bad times as my responsibility... as hard work pays, n i believe dat 'believe in yourself n d world will believe in u'